Thursday, 4 April 2013

Advice | How To Always Be Positive And Happy

I know that we all have those days when everything you do seems to go wrong. Your tasks often all pile up on you, and before you know it, you are pulled over on the side of the road halfway to work balling your eyes out. For some, this seems to be a relentless cycle of negativity and depression that is extremely difficult to escape.

Negativity can reside both internally and externally in your life. This internal place where our negative thoughts foster can be caused by such factors as over analyzing, stewing over things, and being hard on yourself. Outside factors also have an equally significant impact on us as well. These factors include negative influences such as your friends, your hobbies, and basically anything that you surround yourself with. Targeting both of these areas at once will help you grow out of this negative cycle. You can do this by consciously choosing to be positive.

Alright, now I know I have probably lost some of you at this point, but please bare with me! Personally, this realization that positivity can be learned (instead of your outlook being predetermined, like most of us believe) really inspired me. This caused me to start re-analyzing my life and changing the way that I would think. A good first step is to ask yourself objectively: Why am I always upset? If I was someone else looking at my situation, where would the issue be: in my thought process, or in my physical life? 

This really got things going for me. Once you realize why you are being negative and what is causing it, you can start consciously changing your reactions to these things or cutting them out of your life altogether. A few questions to ask yourself regarding internal negativity include:

Is my negativity unjustified, and is easily onset by minor things? If so, this is a habitual error. You simply are negative because its the easiest option for you. The best thing to do is to start curing this as soon as possible! Some techniques include snapping a rubber band on your wrist, adding coins to a jar, or making a list of tick-marks whenever you find yourself being negative. This will help you become more aware of your habit, and help you to stop. Immediately after recognizing the thoughts, start thinking positive and being thankful for what you do have.

Am I not letting a minor issue go, that's is unimportant in the scheme of things? Over thinking is the culprit most often than not when looking at internal negativity. To help yourself overcome these overwhelming thoughts about a certain issue or event, put things in perspective. Will this affect you 5 or 10 years down the road? Better yet: In a month or two, will this stressor still affect you? This helps me a lot when I begin that pattern of worrying and over thinking a subject. This also helps me when I get anxious or nervous in social situations, and when I am trying to become more outgoing! 

A couple of external triggers for negativity include:

I don't know why, but I always find myself being negative after an outing. This is your friends. Most people don't realize, but who you surround yourself with does greatly impact your life. Your friends are probably rubbing their negativity off on you! In order to stop this from happening, you have a few options: You can talk to your pals about your new goals in life, so they understand and can help. If they are your true friends, they will definitely understand and may even come along on this journey with you. Another option would be growing your clique in order to incorporate more positive figures. This will help you by surrounding you with a few more positive people in your life and will help you gain inspiration (The difference between these people may surprise you!). Lastly, you could always end up deciding that your 'friends' really never were or will be your true friends.

I always find that my mood towards myself and my life is changed after listening to music. Music greatly affects our lives. I am a very strong believer in the idea that what we listen to should always be parallel to our goals. Want to be happy? Listen to upbeat, inspiring songs! Even if your musical taste is different, there are always options within that genre that will be upbeat and inspiring. 

I hope this article has helped you in your quest for happiness and positivity! Always remember that no matter who comes and goes, its YOU that you have to live with for the rest of your life. Be happy, being you!

1 comment:

  1. "Always positive and happy" is not a realistic goal for a normal, healthy person. "More positive and happy" yes, but not always. You can try to find the silver linings in life's clouds, but it is inevitable that the happiest person will know periods of despair, sadness and anger. The contrasts of our experiences give us the scale to measure our joy against. When death comes calling on a loved one, no matter their age, is one example where grieving is a good thing. I agree it's a good idea to try to find something to help you shift your mood, but it's not always possible. And sometimes it's healthy to get appropriately angry or sad.